Akshita, Karishma, Tshepiso and me decided that since one of our classes got done real early we would go and chill at some cafe near university. There are plenty nearby so we decided to go into one where Akshita and me have visited before.
Also one of our many reasons to go back is because of this really cute and shy boy who cannot communicate in English but is always standing and blushing. Pretty boys make for a stress free environment post lectures that makes you sleep in your head.
As we sat on the table and placed our orders we realised we were unwinding all together for the first time. Annisa, the other classmate of ours ran home because she stayed quite far, but apart from that it left the four of us to steer conversations at any angles possible.
I knew because the Indian majority was heavy here, we had probably end up talking about food, politics and general things. And that did happen, we spoke about food, spices, politics, saying how our country as well as South Africa is still developing and it will be a long time for it to get there. And then I chipped in saying the clichéd that no country is perfect and we require perseverance and patience for things to get better in time. Apart from that, I also feel how its our generation who needs to step in and change the game instead of blaming the government. The conversations steered after a while to parents and their individualistic expectations.
Tshepiso was given a lot of knowledge as to how Indian parents are always forcing their kids to get into white collared jobs, like be a Engineer, Doctor or Lawyer. There was this popular opinion that Indian parents channelise their inner failures through their offsprings, so that the next generation can make it to where they couldn’t. Knowledge is limited and the possibility of further career options and progress is not given out. The kids back in the country have to face a lot of pressure because of the burgeoning generation gap that withholds knowledge of other career outcomes.
Sitting amidst a lawyer, engineer graduate and a finance professional with many years of experience, I realised how wonderful these girls were and how every one had their stories and chapters in their struggles of getting here and doing what they were passionate about.
Passion. At the end of the day that is really something that defines our existence and our mood. I thought about my parents and how little they have ever forced me to make any decisions when it came to my life about my career or education. Was i lucky? Fortunate? Without a doubt. I never knew pressure from family to go in a particular direction. Getting a 95% in my ICSE boards, my IIT graduate dads ideal reaction would have been to ask me to follow in his footsteps. He never did. He knew that wasn’t my strength and I wouldn’t be happy. He is a genius but I am not.
I chose Humanities and I was told I was making a bad decision by some self-proclaimed well wishers, but I chose to ignore, something I now realise I know how to do quite well. After Humanities and having a passion for journalism and working with Times of India since I was 16, I decided to venture into fashion communication to combine the two greatest passion of my life, fashion and words.
Not once, was my decision questioned or I was asked to get a second opinion. My dad asked me probably only two things – Would I be independent and have a steady job and most importantly would I be passionate and happy at the end of the day?
I think there is nothing in this world that makes me happy today realising that my parents have always given me the ultimate freedom of making my own decisions and choices. Which also meant I got to make my own mistakes, and there were plenty of them, but what was even better is that I learnt from all my mistakes, slowly and surely.
I know now that choices are very independent of your surroundings and family. I mean, look at the courage that these girls possess that despite coming from different backgrounds they chose to follow their passion and make it here, in this moment, bonding over Sheesha and being beautiful in their vulnerability. How refreshing is honesty and admitting that yes I had to fight for something?
Things don’t come easy in life and not everything is meant to be. If there is anything that I am extremely in love with at this point of time and I can’t imagine I would survive without is my passion. My passion spells out my work, my blogging, my MBA journey that I decided to continue because 4 years of design degree is not enough and learning never stops. I think sometimes, I am so passionate about my career and the prospects of it that I can hardly seem to get in another aspect of my life into importance.
Relationships? Well. I have one with myself currently, and I am not compromising on that for sure.
Written by Adhisa Ghosh
Shot on Iphone7plus